It is not love that “spoils” children, but the inability of parents to set boundaries and to be consistent when they introduce rules. Many parents mistakenly believe that strictness is the only way to gain the respect of their children. However, boundaries and rules can be asserted much more effectively with love and calmness than by aggression.

Often parents give signals of weakness and uncertainty without realizing it. These signals include unfulfilled promises, neglecting your own principles and interests, complaining and grumbling, and parental aggression. When children intuitively feel that the parent is weak, they unconsciously begin to look for boundaries and manipulate them, while at the same time feeling anxious and unprotected. “Spoiled” children are confused and uncertain, they do not feel the support of their parents. So they are often nervous and unpredictable. Children unconsciously test their parents to check their strength.

 Parents who have strong personalities speak calmly, without imposing a sense of guilt or fear upon their children. Peace is strength and good energy which always leads to good results. Patience is the manifestation of the same good energy and allows situations to develop naturally in a positive way.

The more relaxed and patient we are towards our children, the easier we will achieve understanding and awareness on their part. Conversely, if we make any hasty and forceful demand of them, this will lead to internal resistance.

Frequently Asked Question

baby and bear

Can fairy tales traumatise children?

Fairy tales can inspire, reassure but can also scare our children. Some tales are so frightening they can create lasting fears in children. Characters like witches and monsters are the embodiment of evil which must be defeated. However, children at their youngest age...
Семейство

Is it possible to avoid a divorce from hurting the child?

  Of course, it is. When we explain to our children without dramatizing or without blaming the other, when we present the situation as something natural that often happens in the lives of many people, the child will accept the change calmly.   Children usually react...
cleaning-room

How do I get my child to tidy their room?

With patience, with a smile, with motivation. It's good to teach children to tidy their things from an early age. Little heroes love to be given tasks which are usually done by adults. When they're five, they like to be involved in any household activity because it...
Нежеланието на едно дете да се храни е резултат от погрешен подход на възрастните

How can I deal with my child’s reluctance to eat?

I remember a situation when I saw a child being literally tortured. The child was stuck between the table and the chair, his head barely visible over the huge plate whose contents had to be eaten. His mother was categorical that the child would not leave the table...
Семейство

How can two parents with different beliefs about education reach agreement?

We are accustomed to accepting differences as something disturbing, but in fact differences can enrich us, and expand our point of view. It's a good thing that parents do not think the same way. In this way children can experience two points of view on the world and...